Last Saturday the family went out to breakfast. We rarely eat out at all due to finances. We went to our regular place. Why did I spend the entire time there matching up each patron with a celebrity look-alike? I was completely joking, and completely entertaining myself! And I might add, I was not loud. I'm positive no one could hear me other then our table. The family was completely mortified. I can't even tell you how many times I was shushed, by all of them. I was having fun. Sue me, I don't get out much! When we sat at the table I said I felt under-dressed, I forgot my gallon of mascara.
So, wanna know who was at the restaurant? (Be polite, say yes. Please?) There was a white haired woman with a little too much eye make-up and she totally had that look that Bea Arthur gave before her "God'll getcha for that Arthur" line every time someone walked in the restaurant. (That look that looks like you're looking intently over your reading glasses, but you're not wearing glasses look.) Then there was Liza. Liza with way too much eye make-up, hair totally done like Liza at the Tony Awards. Seated next to her was Eartha Kitt (again, loads of eye make-up). Then for just a moment, Anastasia played along. I asked her who was seated next to Liza and Eartha and she almost did a spit take. I goaded her on, who's the guy they are with? Come on...She wouldn't say it, so I did. Thurston. Thurston Howell III. Yup, she started laughing her ass off, that's what she thought too, but she still shushed me. (It was all in fun, I assure you.)
Anastasia has been ordering our son baseball cards from Ebay to round out his collection because he has really been stepping up to the plate (no pun intended) with picking up the slack on his sister's chores. Nothing expensive, but the shipping methods for this stuff leave something to be desired. Why would anyone think that wrapping a baseball card in a paper towel and sticking it in a small size envelope would protect it? (Not even a #10 business size envelope, the smaller size envelope.) No wait, maybe it was Bounty, the quicker picker upper, in case the mailman got caught in the rain?
Why do I keep giving Walgreen's another chance? I really dislike the store, no matter the location. I've spent 30 minutes in line, with only 1 person ahead of me because the clerk wouldn't issue a rain check without getting the 'mother may I' from the manager. Then the manager comes over and insists they have the item in stock. So let's make everyone else wait while you check the store, then check the back room. Let's not check someone else out while you wait for the manager. Say, someone who is only purchasing a single greeting card who happens to be next in line? That was a week before Mother's Day. Last Thursday I stopped for toenail clippers. Regular $3.99, on sale $2.99. Didn't ring up the sale price, so I paid cash, went to re-check the shelf, then back to complain. I was sent to another register and 15 minutes later I had my dollar plus tax. Last Friday, different location, coming back from golf, daughter needed a Gatorade. On sale 3 for $3. I bought one, it rings up for $2.53. The clerk checked the ad (yeah, I'm sure we were the only ones in that week for Gatorade) and corrected the price. My point here is, is it company policy to try to get away with selling at regular price? Anastasia worked at Eagle Foods and she claims it's just lazy clerks only scanning 1 flavor of Gatorade. That doesn't explain the toenail clippers, they kind of only come in 1 flavor..
Why am I not surprised that our son's father is not taking him for Father's Day weekend? The weekend that he bitched incessantly about the 2 years prior because the court canceled his visitation both years. Yeah. I'm not kidding. He says he's sick, told the kids he thinks he has...wait for it...the Swine Flu. Can you say hypochondriac? I told our son we will find something fun to do, but I know that we are still going to have to deal with an extra moody teen. I did tell him that if he wanted we could make Sunday's dinner in honor of my Father and he kind of liked that. You'll have to wait for Sunday's post to get the details.
So, what are some of your "Why???'s" today? Got any? Leave them in the comments.
Lola's Diner
©2008-2009
Why do I feel we have to out do the last Birthday Party? It seems each year it gets harder and harder to out do...do people really expect something more? What are we doing to our kids! A Chimpanzee, a zoo, bowling,chuckie cheese and on and on. Then when we reach adults...Heh where's mine! oh just a dinner and cake,lol.Maybe we should tell the kids I'll do this but when you are an adult it your turn to plan mine, 16 years for the kids in return 16 year for us..I like that :-)
ReplyDeleteHubby says afraid of what the 17 year old will pick...Amusement Park!!Yikes!
Man, I want to have lunch with you and your faux celebrity sightings. I'll even pay!
ReplyDeleteDammit'...I've been out-scooped again...
ReplyDeleteKnow what you mean about the checkout thing. I'm sure some cretian at a desk has said off the record, "bill them the full price, with the machine scan and all, if the catch it, apologize profusly,(gush) and they will be embarrised and you look like a hero and most won't catch it anyway, and we make money." There is a store here that has a policy that says if the price is not in the system, the costomer gets the product for free. I wonder at the end of the day what the geek in charge of the computer program has to say to his/her boss. 'Ahhhhhh it's a glitch' yeah will your glitch bought 4 hot meals today that you can't eat. cut it out!
ReplyDeleteMy heart is with your son.
HA! That sounds like a fun Saturday breakfast. I had a college friend who always used to say, "Ladies and gentlemen, star of stage and screen _____ (insert celebrity name)" whenever a lookalike walked in a bar or restaurant.
ReplyDeleteOK, my "Why" for today is: WHY is it always the people in HUGE SUVs who have to wait for their HUGE order at Burger King and end up blocking the exit when I just want to whip up to the drive-thru and get my coffee??? WHY?
I have the same issue at the checkout at CVS. And why am I always behind either the person who is loudly demanding a refund without a receipt, or the little old lady who insists on paying her $25.53 total in ones, nickles and pennies?
ReplyDelete*verfication word- futill, as in futile, which is probably what it will be when I go to CVS later to grab a couple of Father's day cards for my FIL and G-FIL because I lost the ones I bought them the other day!
That is so funny about the celebrity look alike game! That is TOTALLY something my husband and I would do for entertainment! We also like to look at people and guess what their career is, or make up a theme song for them! ;)
ReplyDeleteWalgreens is hated in my city because they outsource their building instead of hiring in-town contractors. So they don't support the local community that they are building in. Whenever they put up a new Walgreens there are literally protesters with picket signs. No joke.
Celebrity lookalike sightings breakfast sounds like so much fun! I wouldn't shush you, I'd probably try to one-up you! ;)
ReplyDeleteRiteAide here is the thorn in our side - 45 minutes to wait for a prescription that was called in 2 hours prior...and there's no one else waiting. Humph! :)
@ Auntie E - I'm just happy when someone shows up at any party I throw. I've had 2 kids birthday parties and 1 holiday party where no one showed up.
ReplyDelete@ Cardiogirl - Anytime!
@ Harriet - Hehehehehe.
@ Punch - The thing is, the clerks don't even apologize.
@ JD - I was completely entertained. (Actually I think the rest of the family was too, they just won't admit it.) Regarding the coffee, pffffff, what are you doing getting Burger King coffee? Ewww! McDonald's is at least palatable.
@ Kelley - We went to WAGs today. Arghh! Apparently Anastasia has better luck. She was in line, I went to look at something, grabbed the items and was able to horn in on her checkout. We were out in a flash! Lol!
@ Yaya - The career guessing sounds fun, but the restaurants near our house seem to be frequented by seniors.
@ Stacy - I don't know, I'm pretty good.