My son came in earlier to tell me how he came to unfriend on Facebook a friend from grade school. They’d kept in touch over the years. Awhile back she told him she was gay and was engaged to her girlfriend. Tonight she told him that her fiancé cheated and they split up. I’m not going to divulge the rest of the conversation, but she lashed out at him and they abruptly unfriended each other. I had a chat with him. I told him that what she needs now is a friend, someone she can talk to. She’s in a fragile state, having lost her mom to opioid addiction, within the past year, I think. Her dad has cancer. I told him that he should text her and ask if they could re-friend each other on Facebook and talk whenever she wanted. I told him if he didn’t know how to respond to anything she said, he could ask me. He’s a good guy, he doesn’t have the social skills or dating experience to feel like he was helping or being a good friend. He probably won’t ask me for advice, but I’m here if he wants it. They are back to being Facebook friends. I told him that she needs her friends now, and he’s one of them. She can get back to dating when she’s ready, or just make new friends until that time.
Then it hit me...
How is anyone dating now? There’s a pandemic going on. How do you meet someone? Yes, online, but what then? How can people hookup now? If that’s their thing, how does that work? Do you both share your coronavirus test, std and hiv tests? Mind blown! Now has to be a very hard time for anyone without a girlfriend or boyfriend. Now is really the time to lean on your friends.
Think for a moment. You’re a twenty-something who broke up with someone, or you were single before the pandemic began. You can’t go to a bar to meet people, or as part of a date if you‘ve found someone you want to date and wants to go on a date with you. Would you even date someone new during this pandemic?
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It's very isolating to be single these days. Both of my kids are struggling to navigate social situations and invites...or the lack thereof. My son is alone in St. Louis and working from home. He is so lonely! He does get together with close friends and is very careful, but it does take its toll on him emotionally.
ReplyDeleteMy daughter was dating a nice guy for around 8 mos when Covid hit...and she asked him if he wanted to stay at her apartment for the few weeks that we all thought that the lockdown was going to last....and he is still there. Now it is a dilemma on whether or not he should get rid of his apartment. Ugh. Painted herself into a corner. He is a great guy and she wants to stay with him, but there is no escape hatch....
Yeah, Covid has created some really difficult scenarios for us all.
Sorry to hear that about your son. That has to be very difficult.
DeleteI feel for your daughter. You are so right.