Sunday Stealing-From Thursday Thunks

Welcome to Sunday Stealing. This feature originated and published on WTIT: The Blog. Here we will steal all types of questions from every corner of the blogosphere. Our promise to you is that we will work hard to find the most interesting and intelligent questions. (Past hosts include: Our first - Judd Corizan, Mr. L, Kwizgiver and Bud) Cheers to all of us thieves!

 

 

 

Questions from Thursday Thunks

1. If you could be a Muppet, which would you be?
Either Waldorf or Statler.

2. Why is a chicken crossing the road in the first place??
Because it used to be a dirt road. The paved road is there now and therefore the road must be crossed.

3. What's your favorite muscle?
The heart. The heart is a muscle. 💓 

4. Cheerios or Rice Krispies?
Either. Mostly Cheerios. Honey nut, or the new one that tastes like Fruit Loops.

5. Is summer ever going to get here?
It's been here. Temperatures are 85-89 most every day. What difference will the season change bring? Just going to be doing more of the same when they have to close businesses and order shelter in place because the spread of the coronavirus is very high. United States on Wednesday had 45,500 new cases. In ONE day. 

6. Have you ever had a utility turned off by mistake or some other reason besides weather or nonpayment?
The power goes out during storm. Water mains break, which you would think would be rare. A couple weeks had 4 breaks. (I live in a small township, not a huge city like Chicago. Not anymore anyway.)

7. What was your "last day" of something?
I don’t want to give the exact date, but early 2017 I went on medical leave. The last day at my job!  🎉🎊 🎇 And the last day I had to deal with the ugly haters at that place. 

8. If you had to be trapped in a TV show for a month, which one would you choose?
It got cancelled, but I really enjoyed it. “The Travelers”.

9. Did you have any type of class trip, band trip, etc in high school? Where did you go, what did you do?
No. I wasn’t in band, or any after school activities. 

10. Do your feet smell?
I have a bad back and shoulders, no way could I pretzel myself to sniff my own feet. Now my socks? They have no funk. 😂

11. Do you know how to French braid?
Heck no! I am not skilled in girlie things. I can barely do I ponytail, and then it’s not going to be centered. I don’t wear makeup. Back in my 20’s I went through a period where I used makeup. I was just not good at applying it and my skin didn’t like it.

12. Two guys are walking down the street. One drops his hat and reaches down to pick it up, the other kicks him in the ass. Do you laugh?
Well...they are either related, or good friends because it says 2 guys, so they are walking together. Would you walk that close to a stranger? To kick the hat guy you would need to be in close proximity. Yes I’m gonna laugh!

13. You wake up one morning and dogs are meowing and cats are barking - what are fish, elephants and crocodiles doing?
The fishes are ca cawing and flying overhead. The elephants are snapping, coming out of the water. The crocodiles are standing upright hopping across the field.

14. You are going to your high school reunion. What award are you going to win?
The last hs reunion I was the gayest one who was out and proud and went with my partner at the time. I felt like a celebrity! Just about everyone came over to say hi. Most of them probably didn’t know me in hs. I recognized them from the yearbook. I even had a classmate from my neighborhood sit on my lap and give me a huge hug saying I was brave and she was proud of me. (Back in hs I was shy, kept to myself, introverted and no one would ever have believed that I would “come out” at a class reunion.) They skipped our 40th reunion, so hoping they will have one for 45. They’ve never given awards at our reunions. The next reunion I will bring my wife. So I would imagine my classmates would HAVE TO come over to say hi to see my wife. (The partner I brought previously is my ex partner.) Ever since my daughter’s first sleepover in 2006 I use this phrase ‘all the girls had to come by and watch the lesbians in their home habitat.’ For the reunion I would say ‘all my classmates had to come over to say hi and watch the married lesbians away from their habitat in a bar hall.’

15. You find yourself stranded on a deserted island. Soon you find a laptop with a lifelong battery & internet connection, then you find a cave with an endless supply of food and a spring of fresh water. A cruise ship comes along to save you - do you get on it?
Nah. I’m good. Wait...is cable or satellite tv included? On second thought, don’t need that, I can stream shows on the found laptop.

16. How many shortcuts do you have on your desktop?
Shortcuts for apps? I have 5 vertical rows. Maybe 60+. Don’t ask me how many apps I have on my iPhone.

17. I offer you a pie... the most delicious pie you have ever seen. You either have to eat the entire thing in one sitting or allow me to slam it into your face, which do you choose?
If it’s a pie I like (there are few that I dislike), I would have no problem eating it in one sitting.

18. Are you a pen stealer?
At businesses I think they want you to take their pen that they paid good money to have their business ad on. Always, hotel pens, but usually accidental. I don’t go to many places that have pens with ads on them. The last pen I got was from my attorney. After I wrote some notes, I handed it back and he insisted I keep it. 

19. A dude from China comes up and offers you German chocolate cake, French fries and a Boston cream pie... what color is your car?
Does this dude abide? Is this dude meeting me in Germany, France, and Boston? My Buick is Obsidian Blue with Choccochino interior. I guess GM was being really creative that year.

20. Sometimes you just have to tap your foot to your favorite song - which tv series season finale are you watching?
I’m mostly in between series. I finished Better Call Saul not too long ago. That’s one series I would admit to watching. Lol!  I do need to finish Manifest, but I need to see if it’s still streaming on a platform I already use. 

Lola’s Diner cc.  2008-2020

Day 98 of Sheltering In

Friday. Got up late. Didn’t get to Meijer til 1:30ish. My wife came with. She rarely does, but she was looking for fishing supplies, doo dads, whateves. So it was the 3 of us. One would think since we talked about getting frozen dinners for dinner, you would think one of us would have remembered. Nope. We’re loading up the car and my wife yells “dinner! We forgot dinner.” So my son and I go back in Meijer and get “dinner” and a couple things that should have been on my list.

We did a porch drop at my daughter’s group home. We couldn’t stay because we had our groceries in the car and needed to get home. 

And...I didn’t eat lunch ahhgain! I think that’s 4 days in a row. PT, running errands, or icing after PT, the time just flies by and it’s dinner time.

How does jelly get on the sole plate of an iron that is stored upstairs, far, far away from the kitchen where the jelly resides? How does that happen? 🤷🏻‍♀️ And how is it my ironing board cover feels paper thin? I don’t think I’ve ironed since the day before our wedding. I touched up everyone’s shirts and ironed slacks.

Lola’s Diner cc.  2008-2020

Day 97 of Sheltering In

Thursday. Did the leave of absence paperwork and brought it to the group home for my daughter to sign. Went home, had dinner, then scanned the signed forms and attempted to email them. Spent over 2 hours. I don’t know why Yahoo was making the photos blank. I tried multiple times. I even tried on my iPad. Nope. I tried resetting my phone and using another email address. Nope. Must be my phone if it did the same thing when using Gmail. So I scanned the 2 documents while in Yahoo, in the email I typed. It worked! The problem is they are a bit blurry. Still readable so I think they will be fine.

Day 100 coming soon. 

How to mark the occasion? Something special for my daughter? Surprise masks and social distancing visit?

The wife haircut is a no go. This weekend we are going to her dad’s, his wife (who is a stylist. Isn’t that what you call someone who cuts hair?) offered to give us all haircuts. I’m going to pass. I don’t want to be owing that woman anything. She is my father in laws 2nd wife. She treats him horribly. I like the haircut I did myself with help from my wife for the back of my head. My son claims he’s going to pass. I don’t see that happening unless I do it before the visit.

Anyone else in Illinois freaking out over everything opening up Friday? Especially since how well it’s going for FL, TX, CA, NC. At least tomorrow the grocery stores will have very few customers because everyone will be going out for breakfast, going out for lunch, going to a movie. Emagine in Frankfort will be open. I remember reading an article about different start dates for AMC, and the other theaters.

Friday is grocery shopping. Woo hoo! Hoping they aren’t busy. My wife has consented to accompany my son and I. She never goes shopping with us. She’s going to get stuff for her tackle box. She went to Walmart today thinking they have a lot of fishing stuff. Nope. Meijer has much more. I told her to go there in the first place. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Lola’s Diner cc.  2008-2020

Day 96 of Sheltering In

Wednesday. I had PT at the same time my daughter was talking to the Asst Director about work and the lockdown, so I had my daughter conference call my wife in so we got an accurate description of what was said. Lockdown is continued until 07/31/20. Yes! It’s not that I don’t want my daughter to come on home visits, it’s just not safe for baggers at her job now. They have plexiglass booths for each cashier, but absolutely no protection for baggers. My daughter has 3 underlying conditions, one being asthma, and she needs to continue sheltering in place. Staff is now taking them to the park to walk (masks and social distancing) and having pizza parties and picking up take-out for all the clients, so it’s not so prison-like. If we want to visit, weather permitting, I can call ahead to arrange it and wear masks and social distance on the patio. Still can’t hug, but we can hang out for awhile. Prior to this I could only porch drop and go. We also got concrete answers on something my daughter was starting to ruminate on. Her place in line for the apartments is safe whether she is working or not when the time comes that the apartment complex build is finished and ready for occupancy. The Asst Director said they have clients now in other apartment complexes that have lost their jobs or are in between jobs. They handle finances differently in those situations and it is not a problem. Phew!

Thursday is paperwork day for my daughter. Friday is probably haircut day. My wife has agreed to let me cut her hair! Yup. Pray for me. Just kidding. She wants a different cut, in fact shorter than mine. I told her we’ll start with the scissors, then the largest spacer on the Flowbee, then the next size down and continue until she is happy with the length. If she still wants the sides cut with the electric clippers, we’ll start with the highest numbered guard and stop when it’s Goldilocks (just right, lol).

Lola’s Diner cc.  2008-2020

Day 92, 93, 94, 95 of Sheltering In

Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday. Saturday stayed home due to the National No Mask Day. No big deal, I just switched my plans. Normally I stay home all day Sunday if at all possible. I stayed home Saturday instead. Sunday did a quick grocery shop and did a porch drop at my daughter’s group home. 

Monday was PT day from hell. They added my R knee, so that and R shoulder. First they did some measurements and strength testing. They also tested my balance. 🤦🏻🤣🤣🤣🤣 I have no sense of balance. I shouldn’t laugh. I should cry. It was bad. It was worse than my first neurologist visit. I think I scared the bejeepers out of my physical therapist. He was trying to catch me, even though I grabbed onto the PT table when he was checking my balance. Then during the step exercise on the stairs my knee just let go. He ran over from another client and tried to catch me. I just grabbed the railings and that stopped my fall. It shook him up enough to say ‘let’s go back to the table, lie down and I’ll be back.’ (Thats what she said.) He little old lady with a cane escorted me back to the PT table. He returned to do deep tissue massage. To me, that is the worst form of PT. I don’t know why, but it was like he was digging to the other side of the planet under my arm. That happened to be exactly where I had a cyst removed several months ago, so that was not pleasant. After that they iced my shoulders for 10 minutes and I was done. My back was screaming because of grabbing at that stuff to stop from falling. I gingerly walked to the Buick, started it, turned on the seat heater for my back and turned up the a/c. I sat there for awhile to collect myself. Then I dialed my wife and told her what happened. She met me at the car after I pulled into the driveway and parked. She little old lady walked me to the house and I parked myself on the loveseat for awhile and then went upstairs to ice more and medicate. My son escorted me upstairs.

Tuesday I felt a lot better, no PT. This morning my knee let go at the top of the stairs when I went downstairs, but I grabbed the handrail to keep myself from going ass over tea kettle. (Isn’t that a great saying that isn’t heard much anymore?) After I stopped the downward momentum I adjusted my cane and went downstairs.

Lola’s Diner cc.  2008-2020

Sunday Stealing-15 Questions You Never Thought You’d Ask

It’s Sunday Stealing!
"Our host is Bev Sykes of the blog "Funny the World".  Welcome to Sunday Stealing. This feature originated and published on WTIT: The Blog. Here we will steal all types of questions from every corner of the blogosphere. Our promise to you is that we will work hard to find the most interesting and intelligent questions. Cheers to all of us thieves!"

1. If you could spend a day in someone else’s shoes who would it be and why?

I never thought of that before. Maybe my daughter, to see what she goes through with her illness and dealing with her housemates. Sometimes I don’t believe I’m told the entire truth. (That’s true about a lot of things lately.)

2. Which celebrity gets on your nerves the most, and why? These questions are hard. Right now, because I seem to be watching more videos on Facebook and they start the next one, and I’ve caught several episodes of that show with Kelly Ripa and Ryan Seacrest. I just don’t like Kelly Ripa. That over the top bubbly, cheery personality. 🤮 I don’t like it. Don’t really care for Ryan Seacrest either. What’s with his face? He doesn’t look good. And why are his eyes black? It’s like he’s high on something.

3. If you were going to bury a time capsule, what would you put in it? Toilet paper, Clorox wipes, hand sanitizer wipes, hand sanitizer, and masks. I don’t know when the time capsule will be opened, but I’m betting whoever opens it wears masks. 

4. What is your saddest memory? When my Mom died, 36 years ago this past Wednesday.

5. Would you rather be in your pajamas or a suit all day? Jammies!

6. What’s the strangest place you’ve ever gone potty? In a field. I had no choice, I was out by the pond ice skating and there was nothing around.

7. How old were you went you had your first kiss? 18. This underaged kid came into the “disco” (or what they heck did they call it back then?) in Red Carpet Lanes bowling alley, apparently collecting kisses for a bet with his friends. He was probably 16. I figured what the heck, why not.

8. Do you have any strange or unique phobias? I cannot drive on the street where I had my car accident 4 years ago. Not even as a passenger. I had to have my wife drive me over there because my attorney had some questions and I had to look at the area to answer them. I also have a problem with people who go up to my bumper, almost hitting me at stoplights and stop signs. If I can’t see their grill I have flashbacks.

9. If you could bring back one toy from your childhood, what would it be? I would choose my matchbox and hot wheels cars. When I was a kid I would take a roll of paper shelf paper, cut it to the size I wanted and tape 2 pieces together. Then I used colored pencils and markers and created a city for my cars to drive around. It was like the rugs with the streets and buildings they have now. Of course my paper City was more elaborate. Lol!
 
10. If you could be any Disney villain, which would you be? Im not really “up” on Disney villains. The only one that comes to mine is Cruella De Ville. She was a sharp dresser, definitely in charge.
 
11. If your life was a novel, what would the title be. When will this stop sucking? Can’t I ever catch a break?

12. What do you need more of in your life? Friends. I have none. Sure, I have Facebook friends, but they don’t really interact with me. No messenger chats. Don’t say, you could message them. I’ve tried that. Doesn’t work.

13. What are your top 3 quotes? 
The only one I can think of is “the dude abides”. Anyone know where that’s from?

14. What do you want people to remember about you? That I really tried to help my kids be the best they are capable of. And damn! It is so hard.

15. What’s the biggest mistake you’ve made? My first marriage. I’ll just leave it at that.

Lola’s Diner cc 2008-2020